10 reasons why I'm glad I'm not Jane Goodall

1. The constant bouts of malaria. How many times can one person have malaria? Waaaaay too many, from what I've read.
2. Black mambas. Need I say more?
3. Too much traveling. At one point in her career, Jane was traveling 300 days a year.
4. Orphaned chimps. Just thinking about them makes me teary.
5. I might consider camping. Someday. But living in a tent? For extended periods of time? Even during the "wet" season? I think not.
6. Too much writing. She wrote so much! Taking notes, writing articles, writing books, writing letters, writing, writing, writing. It makes my fingers ache just thinking about it. I'm serious. I had trouble falling asleep the other night because my fingers hurt. Why else would my fingers hurt? Sympathy pains, I guess.
7. Just a guess, but I think chocolate is probably hard to come by in the jungle.
8. She home schooled her child. What a fruitcake!
9. Did I mention the black mambas? I did? Okay then, what about the rats?
10. She's 73. I am *not* ready to be 73.

she's 11!

such ridiculousness...

When asked why we home school, I usually give some vague answer such as, "Oh, it's just what works for us." Or maybe, if I'm feeling bold, "We feel that our children deserve a better education than the local schools can provide."

Actually there are many reasons I home school my children. Too many to list. A higher standard of education, the physical safety of my offspring, the desire for a strong family bond, all these have greatly influenced our decision. The complete and utter ineptitude of government employees comes to mind as well.

Every year I hear of several stories like this. A boy suspended from school for drawing a picture of a gun! It was one of several small doodles in the margin of one of his papers. According to school officials, it was a threat.

If this is all it takes to get suspended, then I'm really just doing the local school system a favor by keeping my boy at home. You see, he draws pictures of... guns, among other things. He even drew a picture of a grenade once! In fact, my own dear husband drew a picture of a gun just last night! Do you think I should have alerted the authorities?? Clearly, it was a threat. I regret not acting on it immediately. Snort.

Now I am reminded of my sweet little boy when he was six years old. He was working through one of his Explode the Code workbooks. The lesson focused on words that end with -ill; will, fill, pill, mill, gill, etc. Suddenly his whole face lit up as he exclaimed, "Hey! I know how to spell *kill*!" He immediately put pencil to paper and wrote the letters k-i-l-l right at the top of the page. He was so proud. And I, blissfully unaware that my son had just made a terroristic threat, was proud, too.

I'm sure the local schools are thanking their lucky stars right now that they don't have to deal with my little menace to society. And I shudder to think of what my son's days might have been like had he gone to one of our glorious zero-tolerance government schools.

too hot to go outside...

hhhmm...

Little Miss has been clingy/fussy this morning, so I suggested to KK that she might share a P-E-A-C-H with her (I spelled it out so Little Miss wouldn't be disappointed if KK didn't want a peach - Little Miss loves peaches!).

Little Miss immediately piped up, "Eat some peach??"

I swear I haven't taught that child how to spell yet.

chimp lady

I am looooooving this biography of Jane Goodall. I've always been interested in primatology, ethology, anthropology, zoology, archaeology, geology, paleontology, etc. and reading this book, I'm just swimming up to my gills in, well, "ologies". So interesting.

As a child, I always wanted to be Jane Goodall or Dian Fossey, living in the forests of Africa, studying primates. Jane herself, as a child, wanted nothing more than to live in Africa with the wild animals. Unlike me, she grew up and did just that (I, on the other hand, grew up to live in the woods and produced primates of my own). But this book is so rich with the details of her life, I can sit down with it and be Jane.

And oh, the people she worked with! I had no idea that she was Louis Leakey's secretary. She spent time with him at Olduvai Gorge; and he, for a time, tried to draw her into an affair. She also knew Desmond Morris, too cool.

It's due back at the library on Tuesday, but I don't wanna give it back.

a horse of a different color

This is our other horsey-friend, Kodak. He belongs to the talkative lady who owns the barn where Ant E boards her horses. I think I have a little crush on him. And I'm all but certain he has a crush on me, too. He's got long hair, knobby knees, and warm breath that smells sweetly of grass - all the things I look for in a man. (Don't tell my husband I said that, 'kay?)

Since Little Miss wasn't with us, I actually had the opportunity to take some pictures of the horses. When I tried to take a picture of Nina or Taz, they would step back and look at me like a was an alien. But Kodak, my equine friend, was happy to stand patiently and pose...

Purty, isn't he?

this one's for you, Ant E

Moops and I went down the road to water Ant E's horses this evening. Boy, were they happy to see us! And boy, were they in a foul mood! You would be too, if it was nearly a hundred degrees and you were all out of water.

We scrubbed their tubs and filled them with fresh water.

Nina had to stamp her foot just to let everyone know that she was going to drink first. Taz retaliated by nipping at her.

Shortly before we left, Taz rolled in the dust and gave us an eat-poo-and-die look. And that was after we gave him a snack...what an ungrateful pony! We love you anyway, Taz.

P.E.?

uh, hello?

Why didn't anyone tell me it was going to be 102 degrees today?

It's just the kind of thing a mom needs to know when she's driving 4 kids around in a car with no air conditioning, you know?

Tomorrow's forecast: 103 degrees!
I am not stepping out of the house tomorrow. Not a single foot. Not even a toe.

That is all.

how could I refuse?

she said:
Hey, let's play a game!

I said:
What game?

she said:

The hold me game.

tagged again

Ami tagged me for this middle name meme:

1. You have to post these rules before you give the facts.

2. Players, you must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.

3. When you are tagged you need to write your own blog-post containing your own middle name game facts.

4. At the end of your blog-post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

Ok, here we go, middle name:

J is for jeans. I like to wear jeans.
E is for education. Something I am passionate about. It is my job to educate my children and I love it. I love choosing curriculum, planning their subjects, witnessing my children learn to read, working through hard math problems with them, reading to them, tearing my hair out when they forget how to multiply, explaining for the umpteenth time why grammar is important... Did I say love?
A is for the ATL, Atlanta - where I grew up.
N is for noodles, and that's good enough for me... I'm sorry, that was just silly. I must have Sesame Street blood coursing through my veins.
N is for night, a time I look forward to at the end of each day. A time when the freaks are in bed and I can relax with Big Daddy, play a game of Yahtzee or something, and then go. to. sleep.
E is for eh, I dunno. Well, I'm an E, my son is an E, my sister and sister in law are both E's. There you go.

Now I'm supposed to tag someone for each letter of my middle name? I'm afraid I can't come up with that many...
I would have tagged Regular Mom, but I see she's already working on this meme.
I'll tag Robinella and Dura Mater.